Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
sex in a hospital.. check
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
Randomize
