I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Randomize
