I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
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