Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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