So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Randomize
