Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
