I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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