I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
