I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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