You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
