yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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