he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
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