Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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