I got chris browned last night
im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Randomize
