i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Randomize
