Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
We need to rekindle our bromance
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
