Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Randomize
