if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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