used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Randomize