you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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