Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
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