my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
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