You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Randomize
