I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
