i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
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