Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
