i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize
