WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize
