Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Randomize
