All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
Randomize