You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
Randomize
