the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
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