We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Randomize
