i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
They took my balls.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Randomize
