When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
Come see our sink grown plant.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
Randomize
