She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
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