Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Randomize