I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
These tits shall not be calmed
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
