STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
