So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
