i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
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