Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Randomize
