i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
