I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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