It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
