ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Randomize
