so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Randomize
