I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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