Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Randomize
