he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
My pussy is not your playground.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize
