I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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